Trying all possible ways to sustain

Well after so many days I am writing again.. my post are haphazard, having no proper structure or flow. The reason is my life is also not so well organized. I am flowing as the way time is making me to. I tried so many things. created company persuaded people joined a job. don't know absolutely what to do, why i am doing and how i m going to live..
I know this much that I wanna live a life in a way that at the end there shouldn't be any regret. I don't wanna waste my time and my life.
Well here is something from my memory docs

On 15^th of June 2013, I and my friend had finally decided to form a firm and work together to bring projects and try to complete them and deliver it on time. We were highly enthusiastic and willing to do a lot and face all the hurdles to overcome the bridge of earning. We went to our 1^st client and had a talk with him very confidently. Someplace we might have become nervous but with time the weakness was defeated by the courage of our heart and we turned up to very normal while talking to him. Though his requirements were huge and were crossing our capabilities but we remain calm as because in past we have already touched some lines which were out of our reach and just because of necessity we had to cross our limits to learn more and develop our skills to accomplish something really difficult. Any way after listening to him we at last said the cost for developing his project. We tried to be very comfortable while talking so that he may feel good.
This was the first day when I learnt how to talk to customer and most importantly at those situation when we have to persuade the customer to pay, these situation are highly different from normal talks with people.

Okay the first day was over and then I was back to my track, the normal way of life. Next day I had to visit another customer who had quiet minimum requirements and thus we were confident as we had been through this situation once. Now this time we were one time experience professionals and talk very formally. But this customer didn't pay that much amount of attention to us. We were not able to grab his attention as I think so or more perfectly we can say that he was no so interested in building up the website. Any way we talked to him and everything went fine.

After two days me and my friend Rishav planned together and went to his school to have a talk with them. Our motto was to persuade them to build their own website and hence we may get some bucks flowing towards us. Though it may be plenty but it may bring showers of strength to us and rotate the wheel of our business initially. But unfortunately we were not so successful to accomplish what we planned for. Rather our meeting with the principal of that school turned out to be a bit improper and I have figured out there reply, which was definitely NO. They actually didn't say like that, or else we would have been insulted then but we were lucky as they replied ‘give me the pamphlet we would inform you if required’ and we left.

We met 3 clients in a week and we were really happy as we started well. We were filled with confidence and enthusiasm. Then after few days we were sandwiched with the hectic responsibilities which we had taken over our head. One was Artwork-4all and second was Security courses, both of these responsibilities took a hell lot of energies from us and we had no energy in us to give time to our newly formed firm. Along with these, we also made a hater which was Softwebs.co.in. It was easily perceptible that he didn't like our idea of forming a company who would operate and provide services in the same field as theirs; this made us the competitor of each other. Let this hatred go to hell, we should focus on our work and business, we are not going to hate any one or be jealous of any person or company. This is not in our nature. So purely think and concentrate on our aims and 100% flawless devotion on our own company.

After all these days I figured out that the difficulty is not crossing the bridge of earning, it’s actually taking the first step to get a project which may bring cash in the firm. The initial steps are really very hard and difficult to cross.

Today is 2^nd July, I went for an interview at Salt Lake which was the second round and disappointingly it was not so good. What so ever it was a 10k salary job, I don’t know whether I will get selected or not. I was not so much comfortable while the interview. Some where I realized that I can’t be good in technical interview. So was I made for MBA or Engineering? WAIT!!! What if these two courses were not designed yet then? What should you say that what are your skills??

A glimpse of yesterday

I use to think that I am a responsible human who can take up responsibilities on his own shoulders and make things happen. Unfortunately I was wrong, I was in an illusion which had led me to think this, sometimes I use to think myself to be a person who is an Entrepreneur, a person who is full of energies and motivation, a person who believe in himself and tries to do something really worthy. I was day dreaming about myself.